My love

Por Zaiza Souza Vaccarezza Miranda

When the sun came about, and I felt the passage of time, I felt how my hair laid on my shoulders, how the rain spattered on my face, and how the tears rolled down the apples of my cheeks.

When I came about, I finally realized that it was final. That you would never be back, never would I be able to lie next to you or caress your blushed cheeks and see how your eyes squinted back at me with the biggest, warmest, prettiest smile in the whole universe.

As everything hits me at once, I'm here on our lawn remembering the day that you said you

wanted a pet, cat, or dog, or whatever. You didn't care as long as it was ours. All your words

always left me speechless and unbelievably warm; this was no exception. I never wanted

something like I wanted to make your every wish come true.

Here in our bed, I still smell your hair, I still feel your hips pressing against mine, as you

laughed at my distressed grunts. Oh, how there was no better sound than your mischievous

laughs echoing in our room. It's so cold here now that you're gone.

How come a being like you didn't have more time? How come I stayed, and you went? How

come this is all you were able to see? How come you went alone? Weren't we supposed to

conquer the world together? Wasn't I supposed to make every one of your whims come true?

Oh, honey, how the world is dark, bleak, and cold without your morning tea brewing, mixing

with your perfume and my coffee. All the scents that came off you are forever etched into Every fiber of my being, all my body knows how you felt, smelled, tasted, sounded, and looked.

And maybe that's why now that I need the scents of our love I only smell sorrow and salty

tears. Why is it that every time I cry, I have to be reminded of our beach getaways? Why is it

that I feel your absence and presence in the same breath of air?

Honey, how I miss the way you used to cuddle me in the cold, cold nights. How you used to lay my head on your lap while I cried, and you sang, with your raspy voice that you knew would bring back my mood. How when the world would fight to keep me in the dirt, you'd always be there cheering for me to get up.

Tell me, honey, how am I supposed to just forget all of our nights together, of all the sweet

nothings you used to whisper to me? How am I supposed to move on, leave our love, how am I supposed to wash the sheets, even though now they hardly smell like you anymore.

Oh, my love, how I long for our reunion in the everlasting spring rain, while you stand in the sea of lilies, all bloomed, and you smile and welcome me home one more time.